Second Chance
by number14xion
Summary: Sometimes it takes tough love for a person to change. Roxas just wants what's best for Axel. Axel just wants to get some sleep. AkuRoku


For the fifth night in a row, Axel couldn't sleep. For hours he tossed around, tangling himself up into his sheets until they became constraints, chaining him to his bed. When he couldn't move, he stared, silent, bitter, and aching. The emptiness of the space next to him was so large that it carried it's own presence.

For the fifth night in a row, Axel was without Roxas.

In the daytime, it was easier to pretend that everything was okay. His friends would glance at him sideways with concern for his well being, and he could easily brush them off with a wave and a grin. He was Axel, and Axel didn't wallow. Especially after a breakup. Got it memorized? He basked in the sun of his new freedom and dared anyone to doubt him.

But the nights were colder. Axel had never been too fond of the darkness, but it was easier when he had someone to brave it with. Now that he was alone again, the night crept into his lonely room and blanketed him with old thoughts of worthlessness and anxiety. Whispers of self doubt and regret swirled around him until it was unbearable. Axel fought against it but eventually they cracked through his mental barriers and shameful tears began to fall down his face.

_I should have gone after him I should have gone after him I should have gone after him I should have gone after him._

Axel had been avoiding the memory of Roxas leaving, for the thought was like being stabbed. But in the God awful hours of the night, weakened by physical and emotional exhaustion, Axel couldn't fight it anymore and the memories flooded back.

He knew he shouldn't have been surprised. Roxas hadn't been happy for awhile. But he had been in denial - they both had. Roxas believed Axel would get better, and Axel believed Roxas would get over it.

On the Saturday afternoon he woke up to all of Roxas' things packed, he still didn't believe it. He walked in a daze towards the kitchen like he always did to find his blonde boyfriend sitting at the counter, staring at him expectantly.

Axel had scratched his head and continued toward the fridge. "Morning."

"I need to talk to you."

The redhead's stomach dropped, but he replied unfazed. "Can it wait 'til after breakfast?"

"Axel it's fucking three thirty in the afternoon, you missed breakfast awhile ago." The uncharacteristic harshness is Roxas's voice startled Axel and he sat down across the counter without another word.

"I have a flight leaving at five for Twilight Town," he explained, not making eye contact.

Axel crossed his arms. "Well, this is sudden."

Roxas took a deep breath pierced his gaze through Axel's emerald eyes. "I'm breaking up with you."

There was only silence as the words slowly sunk in. When they finally hit, Axel felt his world crumble. He couldn't say anything.

"You can … You can keep the apartment, I'm gonna live with Sora for awhile, until I figure things out." He began to glance around nervously. "And I mean, I guess you can keep the furniture. I-I haven't really thought about it. I'll probably send for my dresser but other than that …"

He was rambling. He always rambles when he's nervous. "Why are you doing this?" Axel interrupted him so quietly, he could have been speaking to himself.

Roxas frowned. "You know why."

"Really? Because I obviously fucking don't or I wouldn't be asking!" The fiery redhead slammed his hands on the counter, eyes ablaze.

"Okay, well why don't you tell me what you were doing last night?" Roxas demanded.

Axel faltered, scratched the back of his head. "I was just out with Terra and Ventus."

"Don't lie to me Axel!" he screeched. "You were with Saix and Xemnas!"

Axel said nothing.

Roxas looked toward the floor. "I don't know if you think I'm stupid or what," he said softer, flicking his eyes back up to the taller man. "I know you're dealing again. And I know you're _using_ again."

Axel suppressed a scoff. Even now, Roxas was too much good boy to just say what exactly it was Axel was using. "That's not-"

"Don't _lie_ to me! Do you think I don't notice when you come in at three in the morning? Or when you don't come in at all?" The blonde let out a groan of frustration and shook his head. "I can't live like this anymore Axel. I can't stand it never knowing when you'll come back or if you'll come back at all. I can't sit around here just waiting for you to die!"

Roxas' words cut straight into his heart, and he could feel himself begin to bleed out.

Tears were streaming down Roxas' face, but he ignored them. "I love you, Axel. But I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry." The shorter man picked up his bags from the living room and made his way toward the door. He stopped in the threshold and said over his shoulder, "I hope you figure things out." Then he was gone.

Now, five days later, Axel was a hollow shell. He felt like he was waiting - for what, he wasn't sure. A phone call. A letter. A rock through his window. Sleep. Death.

Axel wiped his bitter tears and tried to force his feelings away. Viciously, he shook himself out of his tangled covers. He couldn't stay here, not with the ghost of his mistakes haunting this place. He threw on a sweatshirt and some track pants and rushed out the door. He stopped two apartments down on the right and knocked the door. Axel was relieved but not surprised when the the short Xion opened the door.

She smiled at him, but it was sad. "Couldn't sleep?" she asked kindly.

"You could say that. Can I come in?"

Xion stepped aside and Axel walked into the familiar apartment. The layout was exactly like his and R- his, but decorated much more modernly with white walls and dark hardwood floors, as opposed to his that had beige walls and old carpet. He always wondered if she paid more for rent, but figured it would be rude to ask. He took his usual spot on the leather sofa in her living room and reclined into its cushions.

"How's work?" he asked, being polite.

Xion shrugged. "Same old, same old."

"Do you want so ice cream?" she asked as she made her way to the kitchen.

Axel's stomach churned. "No, thanks." Xion frowned and he knew why. Axel never turned down food, especially not his favorite. But ice cream was a Roxas Thing, and he couldn't bear to do it without him.

Xion simply came back with a glass of water and set it on the coffee table for him. "So, what's troubling you?"

Axel scoffed. "Three guesses and the first two don't count."

She nodded solemnly. "Have you tried calling him?"

He scowled. "Why should I-" He stopped, his face fell. "I can't," he said quietly.

"And why not?"

"Because what if I do and he doesn't answer? Or he does but he's already moved on and forgotten about me?" Axel grimaced at his own confession. If Xion wasn't his best friend, there's no way he'd be saying this stuff out loud.

"Axel, I seriously doubt Roxas has forgotten about you," Xion said with a smile.

Axel sighed. There were two reasons he always came to Xion with his late night struggles. One, he could almost always count on her to be awake. She worked online as a virtual assistant to some big shot in Japan, and had to comply with his timezone. Two, she knew not only him, but Roxas better than anyone. The three of them had been best friends since they happened to move in together on the same day three years ago.

So if anyone could give him advice on Roxas, it was her.

"Did he … did he ever say anything about leaving?" he asked tentatively.

Xion paused. "Not exactly. But he was worried a lot, Axel. So, honestly, I was expecting to happen eventually."

Axel just nodded. He was about to ask something else, when his phone rang from his pocket. His heart skipped, like every other time the phone rang in the past few days.

To his dismay, it was Saix. "Excuse me for a minute, Xion." Axel ignored the worried look on her face and stepped into the hall.

"To what to I owe the pleasure?" he answered sardonically.

"We need you, Axel," Saix replied dryly. "Meet at the Grey Area in twenty minutes."

"Geez, this early?" The clock on his phone said 4:01.

"Yes, is that a problem?" Saix loved to test him.

"No," he answered, knowing he didn't have any other option. "I'll be there soon." He hung up the phone and walked back in the apartment.

"Sorry, but I've gotta bounce. I'll catch up with you later," he promised her.

"Is everything okay, Axel?"

Axel had to look away. Xion's eyes were so wide and sincere, just like Roxas. "Yeah, don't worry about me. Thanks for that chat!" He took off before she could say anything else.

The beginning glimpses of light slipping over the sky gave him relief as he headed outside to the car lot. In the daytime is was much easier to force his stupid feelings away and focus on the task at hand, like he'd been doing the past few days.

He shook his head to himself as he got into his car. "Never thought Saix would be a happy distraction."

**So.. this was gonna be a oneshot. That obviously didn't work out. So look out for the next chapter I suppose?**


End file.
